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<title>What I learned by Gladia_Delmarre</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26583103">What I learned</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gladia_Delmarre/pseuds/Gladia_Delmarre'>Gladia_Delmarre</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>No Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Love Poems, Other, Pining, Poetry, Sad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 12:28:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>396</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26583103</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gladia_Delmarre/pseuds/Gladia_Delmarre</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>These are just some sad thoughts</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>What I learned</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>What I have learned,</p><p>this year,</p><p>is that you cannot always live trapped by walls.</p><p>That you cannot hide your own nature for too long – no matter if it can be compressed into watertight compartments, no matter how tight all the hatches can be tightened.</p><p>Water leaks in everywhere when you are drowning in solitude.</p><p> </p><p>I have learned that you give up when something touches your soul.</p><p>But also</p><p>that the soul can be cut deeper than the flesh.</p><p>Fat doesn't protect from anything, it just makes you more vulnerable. Flesh doesn't protect either.</p><p>And me</p><p>I've always been skinless.</p><p>And now the salt goes deep,</p><p>bites and scratches</p><p>and it corrodes me from the inside.</p><p> </p><p>I have learned that there are tears that cannot be mended.</p><p> </p><p>This year I have learned</p><p>that you can fall in love with someone else's love,</p><p>that is possible</p><p>project every part of one's being onto something that does not exist,</p><p>and pine endlessly for what was never yours.</p><p> </p><p>I learned the meaning of unknown words.</p><p> </p><p>I learned to drown myself in a world made of dreams and images,</p><p>like I never did before.</p><p> </p><p>I have learned that you can do the good by opening your doors to others.</p><p>And that someone, in return, can learn to love you in their own way.</p><p>But that when I get too close,</p><p>I always lose.</p><p> </p><p>I have learned that I have to resign myself</p><p>to the crumbs I find on the street,</p><p>because I will never be fed.</p><p> </p><p>Above all, I have learned that it is useless to hope to be able to do it alone.</p><p> </p><p>This year I have learned to love the stars</p><p>to look at them with desire</p><p>to dream them</p><p>to read myself e in them.</p><p>But the stars have betrayed me.</p><p> </p><p>I've learned that people lie.</p><p>What they tell me</p><p>what I need to hear</p><p>The truth is, words are just words.</p><p> </p><p>This year I learned that pain is not enough.</p><p>That what breaks my heart reverberates until it breaks bones,</p><p>and teeth,</p><p>and soul.</p><p>That there are pains that rip away pieces</p><p>that will never come back.</p><p> </p><p>I wonder if they were ever really part of me.</p><p> </p><p>I learned that love can travel fast,</p><p>on letters and poems and stories that tattooed my heart.</p><p> </p><p>What I have learned,</p><p>this year,</p><p>is that love is not enough.</p>
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